I am amazed at how many people I talk to actually also feel that guys are, for lack of a better word, jerks. That they are shallow, fake and manipulative. That they become a totally different person when trying to win over someone. How they treat this special candy so differently from everyone else. And how they change when they have the girl fall head over heels in love with them. Now, she is his slave, trying her best to win his love back while he becomes mean and unloving. Then there's also the very worst kind of creature on earth, the guy who can't keep his dick in his pants. He just can't help falling prey to bigger boobs, perkier asses, things that simply blow him away. I have this idea that most guys, in fact, are the worst kinds of creatures on earth. Most.

Then I posed a question: what if I were the one who was trying to win over someone? Would I become so damn different from the person I am? Be so much nicer? Do so much more things that are out of my way? Yes and no. I guess you can't help but try a bit harder, but it wouldn't (I will not let it) be that different from the real me. I want to be nice my whole life. Unlike some guys I see around me, fake asses and trying too hard.

Finally, another thing that gets on our nerves. The jerk who is a real good brudder to his brudders, real good friend to his girl friends, real good classmate, hallmate, so-called nice guy. But a total, eternal jerk to women. Anything, screw them and dump them, affairs, wife-bashing, rude and disrespectful... the list goes on. A variation of the worst kind of creature on earth. How can someone be so nice to others but so damn mean and selfish and hurting towards someone who loves him. It totally rattles my mind to think of this. Maybe that's why I am more attracted to bad boys and am actually afraid of Mr. Nice Guys. And I am very skeptical when people claim that so-and-so is such a nice person, a really really nice person. Because I shudder to think of what horrible demons will emerge when the bedroom door shuts.

I used to tell people, I can tell whether a guy is talking to a good looking girl, without looking at the girl, and just seeing the expression on his face. It would be full of lust, happiness, and tryingtoimpressness. Disgusting. I like to read people but am really, really sick of seeing how differently guys react to and treat good lookers. It really disgusts me. Though I do not deny that we girls do it sometimes. Someone who has really directly hurt me by this sort of behavior, insulted me even, is a girl actually.

In fact, my whole rant didn't deny that girls can be like this too. Perhaps I've just met more jerks than jerkesses? shrugs.

Someone told me I deserve a super nice guy. But does he actually exist? I sure hope so.